Wednesday, February 27, 2013

At first I thought it was just an anomaly. It was six a.m. and I was not only awake but  the bright-eyed and bushy tailed kind of awake. I was confused and felt slightly adrift. What does one do that early in the day? The MOTH looked at me in disbelief when he came downstairs and saw me sitting there blinking in confusion and  looking around as if I didn't recognize my surroundings. And wonder of wonders, he could smell coffee and he wasn't the one who had made it. Seems this Moon Flower is turning into a Morning Glory.

I really didn't expect it to happen again. I mean, I am a night person and a hardcore insomniac. Always have been. The only part of that pattern I would have liked to change is the insomnia. Insomnia is NOT fun. Night time was my alive time. A friend who has always been a morning person has always joked between the two of us we could keep a business open twenty-four hours.

But it has kept happening. In a strange reversal of habits, I find myself yawning at nine p.m. and in bed around ten. Granted, the insomnia is still my bed partner. It takes on average two hours of tossing and turning to fall asleep.After only a few minutes the bed is in shambles. Even my pillows are twisted in knots.  I sleep about an hour, wake up for an hour or so and then sleep til six. That doesn't add up to much sleep, but I earn every second of it and am ready to give up the fight and get on with things.

This new sleep pattern is not entirely by accident. At the first of the year, I determined I would like to get away from the medically induced sleep that is pretty much all I have ever known. Insomnia began for me at a very young age. Since about the age of four, sleep has always been brought on by an antihistamine or some type of prescription strength sleep aid.  My mama raised me on Benedryl and Valium.  If it could even remotely be prescribed for sleep, a doctor has tried it on me over the years, some working better than others. Sometime I'll have to recount my experience with Ambien. Eating while sleeping-not a good thing. That is decades of facing each day still feeling the effects of some type of sleep aid. No matter what time I began my day, it was a struggle to swim to the top of the sleep-fog I was in. So waking and actually feeling alive has been quite a shock to the system. I kinda like the shock.

So I am getting to know the morning time. I am finding it to be a good time to write. Sometimes, like this morning, I start a batch of homemade yogurt that will be ready later in the day. My "morning person" friend is thrilled at the possibility of meeting at Starbucks for coffee early one day. The gardener in me is seeing the advantage of getting out before the heat of a southern summer hits to tend to things.I don't know if this will last, but I am thinking this new Morning Glory might actually get to see the actual flower in bloom this year, rather than just relying on the picture the seed packet displays.

1 comment:

  1. Awesome Cindy. I understand struggles with insomnia, now more than ever. I need to get your herbal tonic recipe:) Up and going so early will give you sooooo much time to get projects completed, and for the summer...YES...morning is always the best!! Love your way with words...have you started a book yet?
    Blessings friend~~Shine